Edward the plumber
by CaughtMySelfFalling
Summary: Bella and Edward have been married for a while and it seems the sparks in their sex life has started to dim. Edward has his own little plan to spark things up again. Smut McSmutalot. ExB. AH OOC.
1. Edward's present

**Author's note: So I was working on my longer story and I realized my true passion is writing pure unadulterated smut, so here it is. I got the idea for this watching an episode of home improvement, go figure. Well enjoy!**

**Post Script: I don't know these characters blah blah blah.**

BPOV

"Edward I swear to God if you don't install the new garbage disposal you are going to see a part of me that you are NOT going to like." I accented my anger by throwing the plates into the sink.

The box with the new disposal in it had been sitting in the garage for two weeks and I kept using the old one with out thinking about it. I wasn't in the mood today I had a deadline for this book I was editing and between that and the kids I was really stressed.

"I'm sorry love I've been busy I'll get to it as soon as I can." I glared at him hoping he wouldn't take my threat as an empty one, I fully intended to be such a bitch that even Rosalie would be jealous.

"Stop acting like its some big task. I would only take like a half hour. All you have to do is read the damn directions."

"I know love I'm sorry." I hated when he stayed calm when I was pissed. I just huffed loudly before walking out of the kitchen.

EPOV

I sat in the driveway around noon two days after the kitchen melt down over the garbage disposal. I was attempting to work up some courage. I exhaled loudly as stepped out of the car and headed to the front door. I stood at the door only a second before I reached out and rang the door bell. Bella swung the door open with a look of curiosity on her face that quickly turned into annoyance.

"Edward what the hell are you doing? Why did you ring the door bell?" Her eyes racked over my newly purchased jumpsuit and stopped at my embroidered name tag that didn't read Edward.

"Hello Mrs…" I looked at my prop clipboard. "Cullen. I'm from Main Street Plumbing and your husband called me to install your new garbage disposal."

"Edward what are…"

I cut her off trying to get her to understand what I was doing. "My name is Brad and I can assure you it won't take that long, I'm very familiar with disposal instillation."

She just rolled her eyes and didn't protest anymore as she turned and walked in the direction of the kitchen leaving the door open. I just followed after her continuing to tell myself to stay in character. When I made it into the kitchen Bella was walking through the door into the garage. She came back with the disposal in hand. I took it from her and knelt down in front of the cabinet under the sink. She just watched me as she leaned against the counter near where I was working.

"Home all alone during the day huh?"

She rolled her eyes but I guess she decided to play along. "Yes I work at home as an editor and my husband is a doctor and often works during the days."

"Doctor huh he must work nights sometimes?"

"Yes."

"That must get lonely?"

A sly smile crept on her face. I was hoping that she had FINALLY figured things out. "Yes it does."

She picked up a dish towel and started to pull it between her fingers. I knew I was getting to her and I hope thing would go the way I was planning.

"So how about you BRAD, lonely life?"

"I must admit Mrs. Cullen I just broke up with my girlfriend a month ago so it's been kind of a dry spell for me since then."

"That's sad for such a good-looking guy like you. I'm sure there are many housewives like myself that would love nothing more then to help you with that problem."

"Maybe but I must say I have very particular taste in women."

"Oh?"

"Yes. Something about the brown eyes and hair combo that gets me going."

"I see." Bella said with a flick of her perfect mocha colored hair.

I had started to work on the removing the old disposal while we talked. "Can you hand me the wrench from my tool box?"

Another sexy smirk crossed her face as she knelt down and grabbed the wrench. She handed it to me and looked into my eyes with lust over flowing from her gaze. This was working all to well but I needed things to keep going. I reached for the zipper of my jumpsuit but stopped aand looked at Bella.

"Do you mind if I pull down the top of my suit it can be restricting while I work."

She just nodded and bit her lip. I pulled the zipper down to my waist and removed my arms from the sleeves revealing the white beater underneath. I saw here bite her lip harder as her eyes floated down my chest. All of a sudden the slight soreness from the going to the gym the last few days was well worth it. I hadn't by any means let myself go but I just wanted to be as ripped as possible for this. I got back under the sink on my back and began to in screw the disposal. Bella sat on her feet by my leg and I couldn't help but notice her close proximity.

"Anything I can do to help?" Bella said as she leaned in a little bit and placed her small hand on my inner thigh. She was definitely getting into this.

"Nothing right now Mrs. Cullen but I'll be sure to let you know if anything comes up." I couldn't help but wink at the last part. She smiled back and I could again see the lust building in her eyes.

As I kept working on removing the broken equipment as Bella moved her hand slowly up my thigh as she leaned in like she was interested in what I was doing. I couldn't help but notice she was slightly sticking her chest out. By time Bella had moved high enough on my thigh to brush against my cock I stopped trying to suppress my hard on. After ten minutes of battling between thinking about the task at hand and my hot fucking wife feeling up my leg I finally got the old disposal out. I crawled out from under the sink and started to toward the box with the new one in it. Bella only stepped out of my way slightly so that my arm had to rub against her chest. She let out a little groan and I turned to her with her favorite crooked smile. She exhaled sharply before regaining her thoughts.

"You look really thirsty can I maybe get you some lemonade?"

"That would be great Mrs. Cullen."

I don't know who got more pleasure from me using her surname. She seemed to like it because I was staying in character and I KNOW I liked it because never got over how hot it was to know that my last name was now hers. While I was getting even more turned on by my own thoughts Bella sashayed over to the cabinet were we kept the glasses. She reached past the first two shelves that kept the glasses that we used on a normal basis for the third shelf that held the plastic cups from our first apartment that we just never threw away. I could help but take notice of how great her ass and legs looked in that position. It took all that I had to not blow my cover and rush over to her and grab her perfect ass. I contained myself as she retrieved the glasses and filled them with lemonade before handing one to me.

"Thank you Mrs. Cullen. I must say not many housewives I've encountered have been as nice as you."

"It's my pleasure Brad. I'm happy to help in anyway I can." She flashed another flirtatious smile. "I was hoping you could help me with something else before you got back to installing the disposal." Here we go!

"Oh?" She took a few steps toward me and I noticed her hips sway a little more then usual. She stopped when she was just out of arms reach and pointed at something on the top of the fridge next to me. "I need my roasting pan for a dinner I'm making tonight and it's in the small cabinet above fridge. Could you get it for me; I'm just a little short?"

"No problem."

Wasn't exactly what I was hopping she was walking over to me for but I knew she had to have a reason. Wednesday was always pizza night so she didn't really need a roasting pan. I decided to appease her so I set down my lemonade and stood in front of the fridge to get the supposedly necessary pan. I had just placed my fingers in the pan when I felt Bella place her hand on my shoulder.

"Did you find it?"

"Not yet. One sec."

Her hand started to drift down my back and before I knew it she had it resting on my ass. She always said she loved my butt so I figured she was getting turned on by this and I was so worked up at this point that she could have touched her pinky to my eyebrow and I would have gotten harder. I finally pulled the pan out and turned to face her. Much to my pleasure she kept her hand put as I moved.

"Why Mrs. Cullen are you always this forward?" I said in a husky voice.

"What can I say Brad when I see something I want I just have to grab it." She threw the sexiest smile I had ever seen on her face and I felt my dick twitch due to the fact that I couldn't possibly get any harder. "Ya know my husband won't be home for a few hours."

"Whatever did you have in mind MRS. Cullen?"

Bella's smile widened as she closed the space between us and her encased tits rubbed into my chest and I just couldn't take it anymore. I practically threw the pan on the floor and it landed with a loud crash that we were oblivious to. I grabbed two handfuls of the beautiful ass that had been taunting me only a few minutes ago and roughly pushed her back onto the fridge. My lips crashed onto hers in a kiss that was anything but sweet. She kissed me back with equal want and lust and before I knew it she had her legs wrapped around my waist and I held her up while my greedy hands massaged her backside. I let out a hiss and threw my head back when her fingers wound in my hair and pulled sharply. She took the opportunity to attack my neck. I ground my hip into her to let her know just how much she had turned me on and this time it was her turn to groan.

"I need you Brad. Fuck me."

"As you wish Mrs. Cullen."

With that I pulled her away from the fridge and headed toward the stairs. It took all my concentration to make it up the stairs with Bella clung to my front and her mouth again attacking my neck. The time spent away from her lips during the trip up the stairs was to long and when I had both feet planted at the top of the stairs I again slammed Bella into the wall and reenacted the fiery kiss from the kitchen.

"Where's the bedroom Mrs. Cullen." She was apparently still very much into the role playing because she groaned and pointed to our bedroom door. I almost ran to it and made allowed thud as Bella's back hit the wood. She worked her hand on the knobbed and it threw open. I took her into the room, kicked the door shut and threw her onto the bed. Before she could respond I crawled on top of her.

Our hands worked in a furry touching, rubbing, and grabbing at each others clothed bodies. I felt her hands work their way to the tied sleeves around my waist and expertly unknot them before pushing her zipper the rest of the way down. My hands in response went to bottom of her shirt and she lifted her self up slightly so I could take it off. I was greeted with the sight of her front clasp white bra that she wore when she was just bumming around the house. I couldn't contain my self, I graded the fabric with both hands and ripped it open. It fell to each side of her and I didn't bother to remove it from her arms. She looked at me shocked but I didn't care as I took her left nipple into my mouth and let my right hand work her right. I sucked and bit at her beautiful mounds while she emitted the most arousing moans from her mouth.

"Brad I need you in me now!"

I knelt up and yanked down her shorts and underwear in a swift movement. I quickly worked off the rest of the jumpsuit and my boxers and threw them carelessly aside. I brought my teeth to her neck and bit down hard as my hand went between us to stroke her core. I was shocked at how wet she was.

"Just fuck me." She said in such a demanding tone my swollen cock twitched again.

I moved my hand to guide myself to her entrance and I thrust in hard. We both let out labored sighed before I began to pump into her as fast and hard as I could. It was so rare that we fucked like this and I almost felt like I was going to cum in two thrusts. She must have been really turned on because I had never heard her gasp and scream like this. It took ever ounce of effort not to cum and I tried to distract myself with her neck and shoulder, biting and sucking. I worked her as hard as I could and hoped she was enjoying this as much as I was.

"I wanna ride you Brad. I wanna show you you're moneys worth." Her voice was so husky with lust I barely recognized it.

I put my arms around her waist and flipped us over with out pulling out of her. She didn't miss a beat as she straddled me and became to pound down onto me. It took me a minute to get over the pleaser of her working me so hard before I was capable of returning her thrusts.

"Fuck! I'm so close baby make me cum. Make me cum all over you hard cock."

This was also new; Bella and I dabbled in dirty talk but it was usually me saying these things to her. My whole body tensed as I tried not to cum over the words she had just spoken.

"Cum for me Mrs. Cullen I wanna see you're face as you clamp down on my dick."

"Edward." She screamed as her walls contracted and supplied me with the best sensation ever.

I grunted hard as I also let go and filled her with all that I had. She was immobilized by her orgasm so I thrust upward into her as we both rode out our pleasure. Bella collapsed forward onto my chest before rolling to my side gasping for her breath.

"That was… mmmmmm." Was all she could manage.

"You know Mrs. Cullen I think you're husband might kill me if he knew what he had just paid me to do to you.

She just laughed. We just lay exhausted in each others arms as our breathing normalized. We were so spent that we didn't hear the noise from the front door closing until the noise maker was in the hallway.

"Bella are you up here? You better not be in bed asleep."

Shit Alice. I shot up and, for some reason, ran into the bathroom.

BPOV

What the fuck is Alice doing here? I thought as I jumped out of the bed and pulled the sheet from under the comforter. I let the remnants of my bra fall off my arms as I wrapped the sheet around my body. I had barely gotten it around me when she just waltzed in without knocking.

"Bella, what the hell?" I saw here eyes scan the room and they soon fell on the rumpled jumpsuit on the floor.

"Alice I can explain." I shouted as she walked over and picked up the jumpsuit and found the name tag.

"BRAD! Who the hell is BRAD? How could you do this to my brother? In HIS house." She went from screaming to hurt and back again. My eyes unconsciously went to the bathroom door and Alice noticed. "Is he in there?" She took my silence as a yes and stormed over and started banging on the door. "You better get out here mister and face the five feet of fury waiting for you."

The door slowly opened as Edward stepped out in a towel. Alice's face went from mine to Edward's quick as a flash and pure shock monopolizing her expression.

"Wha… wha… I don't understand."

Edward looked at me to explain because obviously he wasn't interested in having to tell his little sister what was going on.

"Um Alice you kinda interrupted us in the middle of… um… role playing?" That was the best I could come up with to clarify things. Edward let out a little chuckle and I shot him a scolding look. If he doesn't like how I explain things next time he can do it.

Alice nose wrinkled up and she shouted "EWWWWWW he's my brother I don't want to know." She threw down the jumpsuit and stomped out the door.

This time it was my turn to chuckle. "Next time we need to lock the door and take the key back from her."

"After this I don't think she will ever walk into a room in our house without knocking and getting verbal confirmation that the coast is clear." We both laughed. Edward walked over to me and brushed his fingers against my cheek. "So did you enjoy yourself before we were interrupted?"

"Ya know after all these years of marriage I thought there was nothing short of asking for a threesome that you could do to surprise me but today… what you did… that was amazing."

"I'm glad you liked it." He wrapped his arms around my waist. "Let's never fight again."

"Yeah that's probably not going to happen." He snickered as he bent down and placed a chaste kiss on my lips. "Don't think you're getting out of installing the garbage disposal especially since you already took the old one out."

"Yes dear."


	2. Bella's present

**Author's note: My obsession for writing smut was quenched again by writing this chapter. Again, so much fun. Enjoy.**

EPOV

After we finally got rid of Alice I installed the disposal. By time I had finally gotten it right we had to go get the kids. Benny was in the first grade and Clay and Abby were at Rosalie's while Bella did her work. We went to get them together because we didn't often get the chance and we just wanted to be around each other some more. It's amazing how great sex can take you back to the excitement of when you first start dating. We held hands every time we were in the car and we snuck little kissed whenever we thought no one was looking. We had apparently gotten a little rusty at that because after catching us a few times Rose got sick of it and totally called us out. If it were possible I was falling in love all over again with my Bella in just one day.

After we had pizza Wednesday and the kids were safely in bed Bella and I went to bed and made love until the wee hours of the morning. I had an early shift the next day but it was totally worth it every time I heard her moan my name.

BPOV

Things with Edward had been so amazing the two days after the 'role playing' that I started to feel bad. I was such a bitch to him and instead of being a bitch back he went out of his way to bring the spice back into our relationship. I couldn't just let it fall on him whenever things needed to be fixed I needed to return the favor.

Edward had to work till about 8 Saturday night so that was perfect. I had Rosalie take the kids for the night so that we could have some alone time. I had everything all set when Edward called at about 8:30.

"Hello honey, are you almost home?"

"I'm so sorry love I just got to the phone. I'm not going to get out of here for another few hours. A case came up that I need to follow through on. I'm so sorry love but I'm be home as soon as I can."

"It's ok honey. Just another day in the life of a doctor's wife."

"I don't deserve you. Really I don't. You're too good to me."

"Yeah yeah. Just keep that in mind the next time I accidentally spill something on your sheet music."

He chuckled. _Doctor Cullen the Miller labs are back._ I heard on his end of the line and I knew he had to go. "I'll be right there. Gotta go love but I promise I'll make it up to you when I get home." His tone was rather suggestive.

"Oh yeah? How?"

"I'm sure I'll think of something. I do still have that jumpsuit and your car does need an oil change."

"Oh Mr. mechanic man I don't know what's wrong with my car it just keeps making this funny noise. Maybe you should have a look under my hood."

"Well miss maybe you shouldn't drive it so hard."

"I can't help it I love it hard. Driving I mean."

_Doctor Cullen you need to come look at these labs._ "Yeah I'm coming!" Edward said harshly to whom ever had interrupted us. "Bella I've gotta go but the minute I can I'm outta here."

"Ok I'll see then DR. Cullen." I didn't give him time to answer because I hung up the phone quickly.

EPOV

When I was at work I was a devoted doctor but after my phone call with Bella I couldn't wait to get home and pick up where we left off. When I had finally finished up with my patient I raced to my office to grab my things not bothering to change out of my scrubs. I called Bella to tell her that I was on my way home while I went out to my car. I drove home as fast as I could, hoping I didn't get pulled over. When I finally made it into the garage I practically sprinted to the door. I wanted to yell for her but waking the kids would be exactly the opposite of helpful. I walked from the kitchen to the living room into her study. No sign of her. I went upstairs to our room.

"Bella?"

"Just getting out of the tub I'll be out in a sec."

After that phone conversation we had earlier I thought she would be just as eager as I was but she was taking a bath? I tried to calm myself incase she walked out of the bathroom with no desire for sex. We had gone at it every chance we got in the last few days and maybe she was tiered. I took my shirt off and just sat on the bed taking deep breaths.

I heard the bathroom door open and brought my head up lazily. My eyes went wide as I took in her appearance. She had on a very tight naughty nurse outfit complete with old fashion nurse hat with a red cross on it. The tiny dress was so tight that the buttons over her perky breast were fighting to keep it closed. The neckline swept down so low that I could see her lacy red bra. My eyes traveled down her body over her tightly encased curves, taking in the sexy thigh high fishnets that led to the red platform heels. All my deep breathing was lost as I totally forgot to breathe at the sight of her.

"Bella…"

"Dr. Cullen is it? I'm new my name is Nurse Betty. I had a favor to ask you."

I was so taken aback I couldn't speak. In all my time as a doctor I had never had a nurse fantasy but in that moment I knew that I would come to be my favorite as long as it was with Bella. She gave me a minute to catch me breath all the while giving me the sexiest smirk I had ever seen on her, which wasn't making the attempt to regain speech any easier. I finely pulled myself together enough to respond.

"What can I help you with Nurse Betty?"

"Well you see I just got out of school and I never was a good student so there were a few things that I was hoping you could help me with."

"I'm always willing to help."

She walked over to me swaying her hips as she ran her fingers over the dangerously low neckline.

"Well, I just can never remember all the places to find a pulse."

She was directly in front of me now and as I looked down at her my eyes drifted down to take in her beautiful chest. For a second I felt like a pervert for so blatantly staring at her boobs but then I remember she was my wife, my fucking sexy wife so technically those were mine.

She noticed my stare. "Dr. Cullen I am very dedicated to my profession and I want to be taken seriously so I would appreciate it if you wouldn't look down my dress." She spoke with conviction like what she really meant what she was saying.

I had to play along. "I'm sorry Nurse Betty. I promise to be a perfect gentleman." She gave me a curt nod. "So you were saying you needed help with finding the pulse?" She nodded again. I ran the back of my hand down her arm. "Well the most common place is the wrist." I pulled her wrist up to face me as I placed a gentle kiss on it.

"Dr. Cullen I didn't know you could take a pulse with you lips." Her voice was dripping with fake sarcasm.

"Oh yes that can be the best way. The lips are so sensitive they can easily feel the pumping blood."

"Oh… they didn't tell us that in school."

I held tight to her wrist as I lifted it over her head. She kept her hand where I left it as I ran my fingers ran down her arm and stopped at her triceps. I held still for a second as she looked at me questioningly. I slowly brought my lips to the soft skin of her under arm. It sent electricity fly through my body as I felt the rushing blood under her delicate skin.

When I removed my hand and lips she let her arm drop to her side with a sigh. This was going very well. I took pulses everyday but never had it ever been this sensual. I had to keep going. I brushed her hair off her shoulder and traced my finger along the curve of her neck. She slowly tilted her head giving me more room to work. I slowly brought my burning mouth toward her swan like neck and stopped only centimeters away allowing my hot breath to sweep over her skin. Her sharp intake of breath told me that she wasn't keeping up with this role playing and I needed to keep her mind on track.

"This is another great place to feel the pulse." I placed my lips at her pulsating skin ever so lightly. She groaned and I smiled into her neck at the satisfaction of what I was doing.

"I think I've got it. Thank you so much Dr. Cullen." I wanted to groan in dissatisfaction because I already had a few ideas of how to show her some other places. "I had another question."

"Oh? I'm always here to help further your education." I threw her a crooked smile.

She took a few backwards steps away from me and I knew that my face showed my disappointment at the loss of closeness. She just smiled as she walked over to the dresser to retrieve a bright red stethoscope that I hadn't noticed was there.

"Something else that has really stumped me was how to hear anything with this stupid thing." She said with fake annoyance in her voice as she fiddled with the stethoscope.

I took the stethoscope from her and placed the buds in my ears. "You see the key is to get it on the right spot."

I placed the magnifying piece over her left breast and heard her quick heartbeat. I never thought listening to someone's pulsating heart could be erotic but hearing how hard hers was pounding with anticipation made my already rock hard dick twitch. I couldn't suppress the groan that escaped my lips.

"You want to make sure that you don't hear anything abnormal with the lungs. Take a deep breath."

She breathed in deep and I moved the metal piece around her chest.

A sly smirk crossed my face before I spoke again. "Now you always want to check the lungs from the back as well." She turned around and swept her hair over my shoulder. "It's always best to have no clothing in the way."

"Oh?!?!" I didn't need to see her face to know that her glorious cheeks were a beautiful shade of pink. She looked at my over her shoulder with a smile that melted my very soul. "Can you help me with these buttons Dr. Cullen?"

My breath became labored at her offer. She leaned back into me slightly and I placed my hands on her shoulders and slowly slid them down to the first button. She moved her head slightly to the side and I brought my mouth down to her ear.

"You know I think that I might live having you around the hospital Nurse Betty." Bella shuddered slightly.

I worked the buttons very slowly as I made my way down her front all the while placing light kisses over her shoulder and neck. When I had worked all of the buttons open I moved my finger tips to the skin above her red bra and traced them up to underneath her naughty outfit. I pulled the fabric down and let it fall off her arms. I would have loved to see the red taunting red bra full on but was compensated by the look of her voluptuous backside barley covered by her lacy red boy shorts. I stepped back a little more to take in the full view as I ran my hands up and down her sides. I guess I gazed to long because Bella spoke again.

"Dr. Cullen is there something wrong?"

"No, nothings wrong."

I placed the stethoscope on her back and she breathed in deep. We continued with the charade and I just couldn't take it anymore I ripped the buds from my ear and threw it on the floor. I slammed my body into her and my lips attacked her neck.

"Dr. Cullen you don't know what you do to me." Bella said as she started to grind her hips into me.

"Give me a chance to really show you what I can do to you."

She whipped herself around and our lips met in a fiery embrace. My hands had a mind of their own as they explored her back and then took rest on her ass. I grabbed hard and she groaned into my mouth. I lifted her and she wrapped her legs around my waist. I ran as fast as physically possible to the bed and threw her onto it. She crawled back so her head was on the pillow and I crawled over to her. Our lips had only been parted for a few seconds but when they were reunited it was as if we had longed for each other for years.

My hand reached around and expertly worked the clasp of her bra open. The speed at which I had it unclasped and discarded surprised even me. I felt Bella's hands go to the top of my pants and she untied them and pushed them down just as fast as I had with her bra. We were moving on pure instinct. We weren't making love tonight we were fucking.

I broke our kiss and threw my head back when Bella yanked down my boxers and began to stroke my throbbing cock. I reveled in the feeling as her lips and teeth assaulted my neck. I was turned on before I step in the door so having her here with a fist full of my dick was too much and I was going to cum in two seconds if I didn't stop her. I grabbed both her hands and pulled them roughly over her head. Her mouth left my skin as she moaned in pleasure. I let my hands slide down her arms as my lips made their way from her cheek, to her ear, down her neck, across her collarbone, and to the valley between her breasts. My hands that had lagged behind were now on either side of her full tits and rubbing the soft skin with my thumbs.

I loved her perfect tits even more then I loved her ass and I needed to show her that. I let my hard tongue draw a line from the valley to her left nipple. I sucked the pebble into my mouth and took it between my teeth as I let my tongue flick at it. She started to almost shake under me but kept her hands over her head. Good girl, that's my good Bella. I left her left breast for the other, inflicting the same torture.

"Oh Dr. Cullen."

That nearly sent my over the edge. I took my lips from her body and made my way down to her agonizingly sexy red lace panties. I grabbed a fistful of the fabric on each side and yanked them over the thigh highs and red heels. Since I was kneeling I used the opportunity to remove my pants and boxers that had only been moved down to my shins. Bella attempted to take off her shoes and I grabbed one in a firm grip.

"Leaves those on." I couldn't even help how sexed and turned on my voice was. Those shoes were the hottest fucking things I had ever seen her in and I was going to fuck her senseless while she wore them.

I let my hand trail down her inner leg and over her heated center before stopping on her hip. My lips found their way back to hers and another lustful kiss took place. God I could kiss this woman for ever. The feel of her mouth on mine drove me crazy. She was made for me, MY Bella; well right now she was my Nurse Betty, but same thing.

"Fuck me hard Dr. Cullen."

It was as if someone had punched me in the stomach. I couldn't breath. It was beyond fucking hot when she called me Dr. Cullen. I swear if she did it one more time I was going to blow my load before I was even inside her.

This internal conversation took all of two seconds but that was apparently too long for sexy Nurse Betty because she grabbed me hard and started directing me toward her aching pussy. I got the picture and as she let go I thrust into her hard. We weren't making love we were fucking. She let out a loud gasp at my roughness but followed it with a deep moan.

I didn't give her time I normally would to adjust to me being inside her I just started pumping away. She wrapped her legs around me and I felt the added wait of her heels on my back and that only egged me on. I rested my head on the crook of her neck as I relentlessly drove into her. I can't remember ever fucking like this, so fast and hard. Suddenly I was worried that I might be hurting her but then I heard her moan so intense and satisfied that I knew she was enjoying it as much as I was. Fuck I was gonna cum.

Don't cum.

Don't cum.

Don't cum.

After pleading with my dick for a hot minute I had regained control. She felt do fucking good that I wanted to feel her in a different way. I reached around my back and grabbed her right leg and brought it up to my shoulder. We both moaned in pleasure at the new sensation but I couldn't stop there. I reached around with the other hand and brought her left leg to my shoulder.

"Fuck Edward!"

"You are so fucking tight like this."

Her rhythmic moans signaled that she was close. Her hands popped up to the head board and grabbed on for dear life as I fucked her. I swiveled my hips as I dove back into her and she let out a yelp.

"You like that baby?"

"Uhuh."

After a few more swivels and pumps I had her screaming and cumming all over my dick. I had never heard her scream like this. We had never had such load sex. It was hot. It again took all my will to not cum as I felt her walls become slicker. I gave her a few minutes to come back down before suggested a move.

"I wanna fuck you from behind. Do you want that baby?"

She nodded weakly as sat back and pulled out of her. She was obviously exhausted because once my body wasn't there to hold her legs up the just fell limply to my sides. She took a few quick breaths before she got up and turned over onto all fours. I ran my hands from her thighs, over her ass, and across her back, before I reached around and grabbed a handful of the tits I loved the most. I lowered my mouth her ear.

"Grab the headboard like a good girl."

She moaned again as she did what I said. She was angled slightly different and I knew how good it would feel. She spread her legs more as I approached her. I placed both my hands on her hips as I positioned my already cum covered cock at her entrance.

"Are you ready for this?"

"Yes Edward fuck me. I wanna feel your hard cock inside me again." She spoke with such need and desire that I couldn't deny her.

I dove into her with enough force to rival the first entry of the evening. This time I had to allow for a second for us both to adjust to the new sensation. I felt her push back onto me and I was brought back to the task at hand. With my hands firmly on her hips I slowly pulled her up off my dick and the just as slowly pushed back into her.

"Like that baby?"

"NO!" Her voice was venomous. "You know I like it when you fuck me hard."

I smirked as I plowed back into her hard. She screamed again and it pushed me even closer to release. Fucking her this hard felt so good I knew I wouldn't last long. We continued our violent thrust towards each other while we grunted and moaned on. I took my right hand from her hip and started pinching her clit.

"You're making me want to cum so bad baby but I need you to first."

"I'm so close."

That was all I needed to keep pounding into her and rubbing her clit. Her moans started to escalate in volume as I felt her walls close around me. She screamed one more time as I felt her explode on my dick. With one last slam in to her I released.

"Fuck!" I shouted at the most earth shattering orgasm overcame me.

We both stayed still as the waves of pleasure washed over us. We were both breathing heavy as I finally pulled out of her and we both collapsed on the bed it total exhaustion. We were too spent to move towards each other we just laid there breathing heavy.

"That was…" That wasn't a word in my head to complete that sentence.

"Amazing." Bella breathed out to finish my thought.

It took a few minutes but we both started to breathe normally. I started to laugh. At first it was just a chuckle but it quickly lead to a full out howl of laughter.

Bella turn onto her side and propped her head up on her hand. "What is so funny?"

"I have never heard you scream so loud. We probably woke up the kids and they probably think you're in pain."

"They're at Rose and Emmett's."

"That's good."

She wiggled her way over to me and laid her head on my shoulder as I wrapped my arm around her.

"Edward?"

"Yes love?" I questioned as I placed a kiss on the top of her head.

"I'm pregnant." She looked up at me as she spoke, a smile on her face.

I let a big ass grin cross my face as I rolled her onto her back and kissed her deep and hard.


	3. No wedding band

**Author's Note: I don't know why but I felt the need to clarify something. This is not really a story about drama. It is merely a collection of sexual fantasies. It's not about plot twists or character development or cliffhangers, just hot sex. As a pessimist of long term relationship commitment I guess this is just my form of therapy. Ya know my way of hoping that you can be with someone for a long time and still have hot, naughty sex. So with that said I just want to say not to worry about any inconsistencies or things like that, just let the lemony goodness overtake you.**

**P.S. I really love writing this smut stuff but a girl can only think of so much. I am certainly not out of ideas after three chapters, I'm just saying that if you have any ideas or fantasies of your own that you would like me to write about or think are hot feel free to let me know and I'll see that I can do.**

**As always thanks for reading. **

EPOV

Life really couldn't get any better. Work was going amazingly, everyone knew about the baby and was really excited, and things between me and Bella were better then ever. I was the happiest man on the planet. Bella was three months pregnant and had started to glow. I don't know what it is but Bella pregnant was the best. Even when she was throwing up and all sweaty I still loved how she looked. She was growing OUR child inside of her and that thought made me so happy.

I was at work showing my favorite head nurse the new sonogram picture when my phone vibrated in my pocket. It was a message from Bella.

-McGilicutty's on the corner of Washington and Turner. 9 o'clock. Wear your suit and no wedding band.

What? I was so confused but with how things had been going the last month I didn't question these types of things. I looked at the clock and it was 7:30. I could leave now but decided to stay and take a shower before changing into the suit that I kept at the office just in case. I checked my appearance in the mirror and noticed the gold band on my left hand. She said no wedding band but I couldn't think why. With a little bit of effort I worked it off my finger and looked at it in my hand, the sign of our eternal love and devotion. She had placed it on my finger many years ago and I had never had any intention of ever taking it off but Bella had an idea so I just slipped the ring into my breast pocket and headed to the door.

I sat at the bar on the corner of Washington and Turner with a half empty glass of scotch in front of me. I looked at my watch for the tenth time, she was ten minutes late. I was swirling the liquid in my glass when I felt someone brush past my left side to slip into the seat next to me. I looked up to find a strawberry blonde in a skimpy dress. I couldn't help but notice her look down at my newly naked left hand.

She smiled at me. "Hey there."

"Hello." I tried to sound as uninterested as possible but it didn't seem to work.

"You come here often?" Oh god.

"Listen… I'm flattered but sorry I'm not interested tonight."

A big smile spread across her lips. "Honey, give me ten minutes and you will be very interested." She leaned in close enough for me to smell the vodka on her breath as she placed her hand high on my thigh.

I exhaled loudly and removed her hand from my leg. "Sorry I'm married."

"Can't be that great if you're not even wearing a ring." She pushed away from me and left the seat.

I loved Bella more than anything and this moment made me even happier that I had her and didn't have to do the dating thing. I looked down at my watch again twenty minutes late. I looked away from my watch and at the door. A great big smile spread across my face.

Bella sauntered in looking around aimlessly. I wanted to wave at her like a loser so she would come over and join me but I still didn't know her game tonight. I took in her appearance as she approached. The neck line of her red dress came down lower then she usually wore, nothing to drastic but it was defiantly new for her. The skirt of her dress was short and showed off the beautiful legs that were held up by spike high heels.

She walked in my direction but didn't make eye contact. My eyes left her body and started to scan the room, two could play at this game. As I looked around the bar I became angry at all the stares Bella was getting. Some of these men were shameless, no manners at all, they just gawked at her.

She finally made her way to the seat next to me. She stopped at the other side of the chair and turned her back to me to squeeze in. I gasped as I saw that this so called dress had absolutely NO back. It was nothing but skin from her shoulders to her lower back just above her butt. My mouth hung open. I had seen Bella completely naked many, many times but seeing all that skin and the confidence to pull it off was so fucking hot. She finally turned to me and threw me a teasing smile as she took in my shocked expression.

"What'll it be ma'am?" I had been watching the bartender interact with the patrons since I had arrived and he hadn't called any of them ma'am and he certainly didn't rake his eyes over their bodies repeatedly.

"Virgin screw driver." She gave a flirty smile as he just raised an eyebrow and shrugged before leaving to make the drink.

He came back with the most overly elaborate orange juice I had ever seen. Did her drink really need all the fruit garnish?

"Two fifty ma'am."

Bella went for her purse but I was quicker. I snatched my wallet and slid a hundred dollar bill across the bar.

"It's on me." He just stared at me. "Start a tab." He took the bill and walked away. I didn't care if it took a thousand dollars I needed to get that man away from my wife.

"Well thank you." She said sweetly as the bartender snatched up the bill and stalked off.

"Anytime beautiful." Her flirty smile was now directed at me instead of the dumb ass bartender.

"Is that you're M.O.? You go around throwing down hundreds for any beautiful girl?"

The right corner of my mouth went up in excitement. "Of course not darling, normally it's a fifty but you just seemed special." She turned back to her drink and took a sip. I wanted more then anything to be the thing against those lushes red painted lips. If the back of that dress hadn't done the complete job of making me iron hard her lips on that glass finished the job. Edward! Back to work. "So do I get a name or do I just have to keep calling you beautiful?"

"Bambi Lovegood." She said as she held out her hand palm down.

I took it gently and kissed the top. "Sider, Justin Sider." She burst out laughing but regained her composure quickly. "So what do you do Ms. Lovegood?" I said while eyeing her bare left hand. Again I was conflicted. It pained me a little not to see the ring that I had so diligently searched for before kneeling before her, accompanied by the band that I had placed on that same finger in front of our friends and family. However, the pain quickly subsided when I heard her flirtatious voice.

"I'm a flight attendant. This is actually my first trip to Seattle. I'm afraid I don't know anyone in town." She looked at me suggestively with innocent doe eyes and I found myself lost in her lustful brown pools.

"Well then may I be the first to welcome you to my fair city." I scooted closer to her as I draped my arm over the back of her chair.

"What is it you do Mr. Sider?"

"I'm in real estate development."

"Oh that sounds fun." Her voice was dripping with fake interest. I smirked at her.

A slightly awkward silence overcame us. How many people had been in this situation? I knew everything about this woman and now I had to pretend she was a stranger and pick her up in a bar. WAIT! This was fucking hot!

"I must admit Ms. Lovegood I am a fan of your dress."

"Really? You like it?" I gave a nod. "It's just something I had laying around."

I brought my hand from its resting point on the back of her chair and lightly traced her spine. "I like it very much. And I happen to find red is very sexy."

She giggled softly. "Well thank you Mr. Sider you don't look half bad yourself. Is this Armani?"

"Yes. Everything I have is the best. I like expensive things." I was having way to much fun playing the pompous ass that my gentlemanly ways never allowed me to be.

"I love a man that knows what he likes."

"Oh I know what I like." Leaned in and kissed the soft skin under her ear.

"Mr. Sider are you trying to seduce me?" Bella cooed as I kept placing kisses along her neck and shoulder.

"Depends." Kiss. "Is it working?"

"Maybe." Kiss. "I've never really done anything like this before."

"I promise I'll be gentle."

I heard someone clear their throat and looked up from Bella's neck to see the obnoxious bartender glaring at me. "Can I get you two anything?"

"No, we're fine thank you." Bella returned innocently.

He leaned in across the bar toward Bella. "Is he bothering you ma'am because I can have him removed?" Dumbass. He nodded and walked away to help another customer.

I have to admit though, I was grateful that, had my wife been here without me, he would have tried to help her get rid of any asshole that was coming on to her like I was, but I knew he had selfish motives. He like every other man in this bar was jealous that I had captured the attention of the most stunning woman in the place. It made me smile to think that I had actually captured her many years ago and she was all mine.

I turned back to Bella. "Ms. Lovegood, forgive me for being so forward but you are positively the sexiest woman I have ever seen."

"I bet you say that to all the girls."

I leaned in so that my lips were millimeters from her ear. "Just the ones that make me hard from just one look." I took her hand off the bar and placed it on my lap so she knew I was serious.

"Mr. Sider you're going to make me blush."

"I'll take that for now. But later I plan to make you scream." I heard her inhale sharply as her hand started to rub up and down my almost painful erection. I moaned in her hear and she giggled.

"Don't start anything you don't plan to finish Ms. Lovegood."

"Oh I plan to finish." Bella said as she ran her thumb over the head of my dick.

I let out a hiss. "Let's get out of here."

"First I just need to go to the ladies room really quick. I'll be right." She spoke in an almost cheer tone as if she hadn't just had her hand rubbing on the rock hard budge in my pants.

She slid off her seat and made her way to the back of the bar toward the rest rooms. I let out a heavy sigh and ran my hands through my hair. Yep it was officially, my wife had made me so horny with her games that I was about ten seconds away from humping her leg. My mind started to fill with thoughts of how this would play out. Do I take her back to the house we share? That seemed to wreck the meet-someone-in-a-bar-and-have-hot-crazy-sex fantasy. I remember passing a moderately fancy hotel on the corner and decided that would be best since I probably couldn't even make it home at this point.

I looked over at the bathrooms and a smirk came to my lips. I threw back the rest of my scotch and headed to the back of the bar. I went to the door of the ladies room and took a deep breath before walking in. As soon as I stepped in I saw Bella at the sink drying her hands on a paper towel. He eyes shot up and spotted me in the mirror with surprise all over her face. I barely noticed the other two women standing at the other sinks as I walked over to Bella and lightly grabbed her arm and pulled her into the largest bathroom stall.

I slammed the door shut and pressed her against it. My lips met hers and fire over took my body. My hands went to her face to hold her still as I took out all the desire and need that she had caused to build deep within me. I heard the lock on the door click and felt Bella's arms wrap around my waist and pull my lower half closer to her. I groaned into her mouth as my hard length pressed into her.

I felt her hands snake up to my chest and forcefully push me away. Our lips parted and she pushed me hard into the opposite wall of the stall taking her turn at a lip on lip attack. My hand went to her back to pull her closer. When I got there I was reminded of her lack of dress and couldn't suppress another moan. I let my hands run over her bare skin and I felt her shiver against me. I felt her bring her leg up next to me and rest her knee on the wall at my side. Bella had always been flexible and as always it was fucking hot. She leaned her hips into me and my head fell back against the wall as my eyes rolled to the back of my head.

Bella's lips were all over whatever exposed skin she could find and it felt amazing. When she bit down hard on my ear lobe I couldn't take it anymore I had to have her lips again. I leaned back down to reunite my swollen mouth to hers as my hands traveled lower down her back. My hands easily glided underneath the fabric of her dress and I grabbed two handfuls of her full ass. As I massaged it I noticed a lack of fabric. Oh shit Bella wasn't wearing underwear; oh Christ she was wearing a short, backless, red dress with NO underwear. I couldn't take it.

"Bambi, let's get out of here." I practically moaned into her ear.

She pulled away from me and just nodded with a sexy smile on her face. I returned a crooked smile and we headed out of the stall and through the bar. As we walked past the bartender that I had barley allowed to live after, he waved the hundred at me and I just shook my head. Enjoy your $97.50 tip.

BPOV

Edward was practically pulling my arm out of the socket as he dragged me down the street. I wasn't sure where we were going but I trusted him to lead. However, I was slightly alarmed at the speed he was pulling. I had attempted to over come my bad relationship with high heels when I was 20 and had my first internship at a publishing house but I wouldn't say that I was a master at it and right now I was wearing pretty tall ones that would be all to easy to fall over in and brake my neck.

Before I knew it we were entering a hotel and he was pulling me toward the front desk.

"We need a room." My face turned red at the huskiness of his voice. His tone all but shouted out what was going on in his pants and, since I was scantily dressed and neither of us had wedding bands on, I knew the desk clerk would assume the something embaressing.

"Of course. How long will you be staying?"

"Just tonight." God this is getting worse. I had initiated tonight but right now I felt like putting on a blonde wig and calling myself Vivian.

"Of course." He gave a smug smile and I wanted to slap him in the face. "Any bags?"

"NO." Edward practically shouted. He was apparently getting annoyed as well.

My annoyance at the clerk quickly fluttered to the back of my mind as I looked at Edward. I had never seen him this worked up with clothes on. I turned my body so that my back was leaning against the high desk and I was tightly at his left side. A devilish grin crossed my face.

"I'm just going to need a credit card." I placed my hand at Edward's knee. He gasped slightly.

"I'll pay cash." I drew little circles with my fingernail.

"I'm sorry sir we only take credit cards in case something happens to the room and we need to charge you for it." I stared to work my palm up and down his thigh.

"Fine whatever." I lightly passed over the budge in his pants as I moved my hand over to his other leg to start rubbing.

He dropped three cards out of his wallet as I touched his sensitive area and practically threw a random card at the clerk. My distractions were apparently working because the card he had just handed the man is one that I had canceled last month.

"I'm sorry sir this card appears to not be working. Do you have another one?" I passed over his hardness again as I brought my hand up to the waist of his pants. I slid two fingers between his tucked in shirt and his pants and slowly moved them side to side.

He growled as he threw another card at the man.

I took my fingers out from behind his waistband and decided to go for the gold. I lightly ran my hand over his hardened erection. He tilted his head back a little as his eyes closed.

"Are you alright sir?"

He snapped his head forward and opened his eyes. "I'm fine." I knew it was wrong but I couldn't help myself, I kept rubbing the erection in his pants.

"Alright. Well you're all set. You'll be in 1060. Will you be needing a wake up call?"

"Nope." Edward practically lunged across the desk to grab the key car from the man's half out stretched hand.

We went to the elevators and he pushed the up button about 300 times like a five year old that thought it would make it come faster. One finally opened and we hurried inside.

"Hold the elevator!"

"Sorry gotta get the next one." Edward yelled as he slammed the button to close the door.

The door closed and I was up against the back wall with Edward attacking my neck.

"Are you trying to kill me?" He said between nips and kisses.

I giggled as I looked down at the floor. I suddenly got the best idea.

"Look at that." I said as I lifted my shoe into view around Edward's body.

He stopped his assault on my neck and looked at me confused. I just pushed him off of me and stepped to the middle of the elevator.

"There's something on the strap of my shoe."

With my back towards him I bent down with completely straight legs to attend to the nonexistent something on my shoe. Let's be honest I knew how I looked in the position I was in and Edward was getting the best ass shot possible. It was probably even better then initially intended given the fact that my skirt was really short and when I bent over I felt a slight breeze. I heard him inhale sharply. Mission accomplished.

Neither of us head the door open until me her someone clear their thoat. Both of our heads shot up and saw a couple probably in their fifties about to get into the elevator. I could only imagine how we looked. I was in a barely there mini dress and bent over with straight legs as my ass was pointed at Edward who was sporting some major wood in the corner.

"We'll get the next one." He women spoke with a smirk on her face.

I was probably as red as my dress as I stood up and gave them an apologetic smile while the doors closed. I looked at Edward and he started to laugh. That was not funny, I was mortified. I turned away from him as I crossed my arms across my chest and pouted. He stopped laughing and came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Don't give me that lip or I'm going to have to bit it." Hot!

He kissed all over my neck and shoulder as his hands roamed the front of my body. I knew now wasn't the time to get mad at him so gave in a tilted my head to the side to give him more room.

"That's what I thought."

I growled at him for bring attention to the fact that I had surrendered but the things he was going with his lips made me not care quickly.

When we finally reached the tenth floor Edward grabbed my hand and started dragging me down the hall. He found our room and I watched as he attempted to work the key card in the door; another golden opportunity. I circled my arms around his waist and went straight for his belt. I didn't think I would have time to get if off but he must have been really flustered because I had it and the button on his pants undone before he got the key to work.

He turned around in my arms and swooped me up bridal style. He kicked the door closed as we entered and threw me on the bed before virtually jumping on top of me.

"Mr. Sider are you always this rough?" I let my voice show the excitement I was feeling between my legs.

"Fuck it Bella I just want you right now."

Our lips met in need as our hands hurriedly explored each other's bodies. His right hand went from my sides to underneath the front of my dress. I let out a moan in his mouth as his nimble fingers massaged my breast.

My hands went to the buttons of his shirt, I got all of two undone before I got frustrated and ripped it open causing buttons to fly everywhere. I dragged my fingernails down his chest roughly.

"Fuck Bella."

He brought him self up to his knees to take his shirt and jacket off but I couldn't wait for him to come back. I sat up and kissed his chest as my hands went to finish the job I had started on his pants. He wound his fingers in my hair as I worked his zipper down and, with lips still on his muscular torso, I pulled down his pants and boxers.

I felt his hands go to my shoulders and push me back down on the bed. His lips crashed into mine once again as he grounded his newly freed erection against me. His hands started to slowly work up my thigh toward removing my dress and I stopped him by rolling us over. Our lips never parted as we moved to the new position of me straddling him. My greedy hands roamed all over his chest. The feel of his defined muscles caused me to moan again. I felt him kick off his shoes, pants, boxers and socks leaving him completely naked underneath me while I, in relation to how I had started the evening, was completely clothed.

He hands started up my thighs towards my dress again. I stopped him with my own and sat up. He looked at me confused and I just winked at him as my hands moved from over top his to the hem of my dress. As slow as humanly possible I pulled my dress upward. I heard him groan and I smiled to myself. When I finally had the dressed discarded I let my head fall back as I shook out my hair and slightly thrust my breast forward.

"God you're beautiful." I never tired of hearing that from him.

I leaned back even further and attempted to work the buckle on my shoe.

"Leave 'em on. I love fucking you in heels."

I brought my gaze back to him and took in his lustful appearance. His eyes practically burned into me with need. After the torture in the lobby I couldn't deny him and longer. I moved back to position myself over him. I reached between my legs and grabbed his rock hard dick and placed at my entranced. I slowly slid down onto him and I felt his hands grab tight onto my hips. I brought myself up quickly before slowly sliding back down.

"Fuck baby you feel so good."

A groan was all I could manage in response.

He started to buck up into me as his hands guided my hips down onto him; it was mind blowing. I had been almost dripping in the bathroom at the bar so I knew it wouldn't take much. My hands had taken rest on my breasts and I was absentmindedly manipulating them with my fingers. I the two feelings of being fucked and touching my tits almost sent me into sensory over load.

"Cum for me Bella I'm to close."

_Pretty much almost there Mr. Cullen._ I thought to myself when I felt his one hand leave my hip. All it took was one pinch of my clit and I was sent forward onto my hands that landed on either side of Edward, screaming as I was sent flying into nirvana. It wasn't two thrust later that I felt him tighten underneath me.

"Bella!" He screamed as his head pushed back hard into the pillow and he thrust deep into me shooting his hot liquid.

My arms gave out as I fell forward into him in pure exhaustion. I was to tired to even move when I heard someone banging on the wall by the headboard telling us to stop being disgusting and shut the hell up. We both laughed.

I took us a minute but we caught out breathes and I rolled off and snuggled to his side.

"Sorry that didn't last long love. I know it would be a quick night when I saw you in that dress."

I looked up at him. "It's ok because that was amazing."

He smiled and I turned my head away again to rest it on his shoulder.

"Oh and Bella?"

"Yes Edward?"

"You are never wearing that dress in public again."

**Author's note: What will come next? Dare I say stripper pole?**

**Internet connection: $20.00 a month. account: Free. Reading three pages of smut: few minutes. Satisfying an author's addiction to reviews: Priceless.**


	4. Long awaited stripper pole

**AN: So I'm kind of sorry that I haven't updated this story in a while but not at the same time. Just for the record this really isn't a plot driven story, it's just something I write when inspiration hits. So…**

**Enjoy my recent inspiration!**

EPOV

Mine and Bella's latest sexual endeavors had apparently turned me into a horny teenaged boy because every time my mind wasn't full occupied it would drift to our different encounters. Bella on her tiptoes getting the unnecessarily plastic glasses, Bella in the nurse's uniform, and, the one that always made me instantly half hard, Bella in the red dress.

I was seeing the dangerously skimpy dress again when I was slapped back to reality in the form my tiny sister yelling my name. "EDWARD!"

I shook my head a few times to get the thoughts of the half naked Bella out before I pushed my self off the wall I was leaning against.

"I am sorry I'm late you would never believe the traffic." I knew it was a lie. Alice was always late, for everything, it was just part of her that we accepted.

"Sure Al."

She smacked my arm before we headed into the restaurant for lunch. I we were quickly seated by an overly eager hostess who shamelessly flirted with me even after all my attempts to flash my wedding ring. Look at the gold bad only inspired a train of thought. Wedding ring gone, the bar, the dress. Fuck I'm hard again. Dead puppies, dead puppies.

"So how are things going with the new line?" I asked I hope of distracting my thoughts.

"Good I think this one might get me into a financial situation where I don't have to ask mom and dad for money." We both laughed a little.

Alice was a designer but wasn't really well known yet. She was 25 and fresh out of design school. Our parents had finances her first line happily. I knew she was really determined to make it work on her own though.

"It's just been so crazy I don't have time for anything anymore. I'm almost glad Bella got pregnant and had to drop that damn class…" She just stopped mid sentence and looked up at me shyly as if to see if I noticed.

"You and Bella were taking a class together? What class?" I was really confused. Bella would have mentioned this.

"Um… yeah it was a… yoga class." I knew Alice well enough to know when she was lying. Plus the idea of my clumsy Bella doing yoga was just laughable.

"Alice for some reason I just don't believe you." I smirked at her and she turned red. Ok it was totally normal for Bella to blush but confident Alice never blushed. "Alice you're scaring me. What class were the two of you taking?"

"I wasn't supposed to tell you so you can't tell her I told you ok?"

"Alice."

"Ok so like a while ago Bella and I were talking and out of nowhere she started talking about taking this class at the gym. I was totally against it when she first mentioned it but she convinced me it would be fun so we signed up. It really was a great work out. I don't think I have ever sweated that much in my life. And it was really… educational."

"Alice just tell me."

"Um it was a stripper class."

"A… stripper class?" I didn't even know they offered that. "You watched Bella strip?"

"GOD NO! They just teach you things. Technically the class was called strip cardio. They teach you how to do lap dances and use a pole and stuff."

"My wife knows how to do a lap dance?!" I yelled a little loud earning some glances our way.

"Technically yes. But when she found out she was pregnant she didn't want to do it anymore." She looked at me apprehensively as if she thought I was going to freak out. Hell no I wasn't going to freak out, because now I know that my wife knows how to use a stripper pole!

An idea crept into my head and caused me to smile to myself. "I promise I won't tell her you told me."

"Ew! You're not thinking something pervy are you?"

I just smiled at her as the wheels in my mind started turning. This was going to be good.

BPOV

Alice had been hounding me all week about going out Saturday night. I was pregnant for Christ sake, it's not like I could go out and get wasted and have a really good time. Not that I needed to drink to have a good time but when you best friend tells you you're going out Saturday night you assume drinking is involved. So I prepared for the night by dropping the kids off at Carlisle and Esme's early in the afternoon so that I could take a nap so I would be tiered at 9 o'clock like I seemed to always be lately.

She surprised me by taking me to a rather nice bar full of businessmen and women in suits. We talked at the bar while I drank my non-alcoholic whatever and she had her usual cosmo. I have to admit it's kinda nice that even after all these years of marriage I still get hit on when I don't go places without Edward. It's nice to know that someone besides your spouse still finds you fuckable. But as always Alice and I sweetly brushed them off.

By ten o'clock all my preparatory efforts were fruitless and I was getting tiered. I was glad when she said that it was time to leave anyway and we both headed to my car. I dropped her off and started the ten minute drive back to my place. Edward was at work for the night so I was looking forward to just getting home and crawling into bed.

I parked in my usual spot in the garage and headed inside. I wasn't really paying attention as I walked upstairs and to our bedroom. I opened the door and lifted my head sluggishly and was totally shocked at what I saw in front of me.

Edward was sitting in a wing back chair from my study that was stationed at the foot of the bed. He was sitting directly in front of a pole that I knew was not in this bedroom this morning. A slow smile spread across my face as realization set in. I waited for him to speak so I could get some sort of clue as to what the game was tonight. It didn't take him long to explain himself.

"Hello, you must be Heidi. You're madam says that you are the best girl she has. I must admit though her description doesn't do you justice."

Oh I got it. I'm a call girl. And apparently I was the best.

"Yes sir. My madam tells me that you are very rich and powerful. And that you are a very good tipper." I tried to use my best sexy voice.

"Only if you earn it." _Oh I'll earn it!_ "Now I have some things laid out for you in the bathroom I want you to put them on and come back out quickly." He pointed to the slightly ajar door and I just nodded and made my way towards it.

When I was inside and had the door shut behind me I let out a deep sigh. All tiredness was lost as pure excitement and anticipation took over. After collecting my thoughts for a minute I looked around the room to find what he had wanted me to wear and I saw it hanging on the towel rack. I walked over and picked it up to examine it. It was a polka dot halter mini dress with black and red lace accenting every edge. Next to the dress was a matching pair of panties with peek-a-boo hole on the back. I looked down and saw a pair of red ankle strap pumps sitting neatly on the floor. I knew that I would probably keep those on all night and my stomach flipped in anticipation.

I looked over all the clothes Edward had purchased for me and couldn't help but let out a little sigh. I wasn't self conscience exactly but I was pregnant and not feeling like my body was the absolute best shape it had ever been. I pushed those thoughts out of my head as I took my clothes off and slipped into the polka dot number. After I had the shoes securely in place I took a look in the mirror and noticed how innocent I looked. A smirk came to my mouth as I got a wicked idea. I walked up to the mirror and grabbed my brush and quickly worked my hair into two low pony tails that fell down each shoulder. With one last once over I made my way back to the door.

I stepped back into the bedroom to see that Edward hadn't moved from his spot in the chair. I closed the door behind me and just stood in front of it awaiting more instructions.

"Come here." His voice wasn't demanding or stern just authoritative. Without a word I walked over and stood directly in front of him. "Let me get the full view. Turn around. Slowly." The last word let me know just how slowly he wanted me to move.

I turned very slowly taking immense care not to trip on my own feet. When I was turned in the opposite I held still for a minute so he could take in the sight of the mini dress not fully covering my backside. I heard a low, throaty growl and smiled at myself. There were certain things about my body that I knew he loved and I wasn't afraid to tease him with them. I gave my ass a little shake before continuing my slow twirl.

"Very nice. I can't wait to see what's under the clothes." He spoke so smoothly I almost moaned from his words alone.

"I'm sure you'll like it."

"I'm sure I will." He let his eyes roam over my body one more time before he spoke again. "I was told you knew how to use that." He nodded towards the pole that was directly behind me. I smirked at him and gave him a wink of confirmation. "Alright then."

I saw him pull a remote out of his pocket and aimed it at the i-home on the other side of the room. The Foo Fighters Darling Nikki came streaming into the room. I loved this song and knew exactly what I would do to drive him crazy.

EPOV

The music started to play and Bella swayed to the music. She brought her hands to her hips and slowly worked them up her body. The way that her hands leisurely moved was so tempting. I was already working hard not to break character and ravage her right there.

She kept simply swaying her hips as her hands roamed over her curves with the most seductive smirk on her face. When the chorus started she gave one quick wink before turned and swung around the pole like an expert. I was totally shocked at the amount of skill in which she managed. After her spin she stood directly in front of me with her back against the pole. She rubbed her back up as she palmed her breasts in each hand. I had to squirm in my seat a little to deal with the uncomfortable bulge in my pants.

By this time the music was back into the fast paced chorus. Bella pushed away from the pole and turned around to face it. With out missing a beat she grabbed high and hurled her self upwards as she wrapped her tights tightly around the pole.

_God I want to be that pole._

She held her position for a minute before gracefully dismounting and landing perfectly on her impressive heels. At this point I was panting like a dog as she slowly made her way around the pole.

I'd been to strip clubs before. And yes Emmett had gotten strippers for my bachelor party but none I had ever seen were more of a turn on then my wife at this moment. I took a soothing breath reached in my pocket for the wad of cash I had. When I pulled it out Bella took notice.

"Is that for me?"

"I'll give you what I feel you deserve. If it touches the floor it's yours."

She gave a smirk turned back to face the pole. Before I knew what was happening she grabbed onto it again and threw her legs up over her head and around the pole. I had to blink twice to make sure I was actually seeing what I thought I was. Yep, she had her thighs wrapped around the pole as her head faced the floor. Her little dress had fallen down a little bit and I could see her matching panties. Ok, that was impressive so I threw a twenty on the floor in front of me.

I thought that was the trick but apparently I was wrong. She started to slither down the pole until her hands met the floor. She slowly walked her hands out so that her body was parallel to the ground and her thighs were tightly clamped to the metal.

_GOD! I REALLY want to be that pole._

She held the position for a minute before she let her legs slide down and her arms bowed like she was doing a push up. When she was laying flat on the floor she rolled on her side and swung her leg around the pole and stood. I had to swallow hard. I threw a few more twenties on the floor.

**(AN: This move is called Handstand Pole Dancing Dual Leg Sliding Dismount. If you don't really get what I was trying to explain you can youtube it.)**

Bella seemed to notice her tips as she placed one hand on the pole and started to walk around the pole. Next thing I knew she was swung her leg and round and bent both at the knee. The only thing she had supporting her weight as she spun was her small hand.

**(AN: Captain Hook Leg Hook.)**

Five or six more twenties for that one! She stood back up and looked like she was planning her next move. I don't think that I could take it.

"Come here." Thankfully my voice didn't crack, that would have been embarrassing.

She stopped what she was doing and walked over to me. She stood about two feet away from me waiting for directions. I retrieved the remote in my pocket and skipped to the next song. Nine Inch Nails' Closer filled the room.

"I want you to dance for me." I sat up straighter in the chair as she nodded at me in understanding.

The electric beat started and Bella started to sway her hips to the slow beat. Her hands started at her hips and moved to her stomach. She had her eyes closed and her face was turned to the side as her hands roamed her over her front. She brought her eyes back to mine when she cupped her breast and roughly squeezed them. Twenty down. She smirked and moved her hands up over her neck and stretched them into the air. I took in the look of her body in its current position. My eyes started at her arms that were held limply above her head and descended down her admiring the curve of her hips as they swayed to the music. I suppressed another moan by biting my lip as my eyes traveled down her perfectly toned legs that ended in the fuckme red heels.

When my eyes snapped back up to hers I saw her smiling at me with her lip in between her teeth. She looked sexier then any woman had any right to be.

She was taking things slow and it took every bit of my will to let her. I was keeping calm by taking even breaths. She brought her hands down to the sides of her breasts and did the slowest forward body roll while running her hands down her sides and ending in a squat with her hands on her knees. She held that pose for a few seconds as she ran her hands up and down her thighs.

When she was satisfied she had teased me enough with that view she leaned forward onto her hands and started to stalk towards me. She made her way to me until she was kneeling between my parted legs. With one last smirk she simultaneously stood up and turned around before pressing her back against my chest. In time with the music she rubbed her body against me expertly and it felt so fucking good.

I knew lap dance etiquette mandated that I keep my hands to myself so I was all bit digging my nails into the arms of the chair as she worked her body against mine.

"You feel so fucking good." I breathed out.

She turned her head to the side so that I could fully see her face. The sight of pure lust in her eyes was more then I could take, etiquette be damned, I forcefully crushed my mouth to hers and kissed her with all that I had. I felt her place her hands over mine and bring them from the arm of the chair to exposed thighs and I somehow lost my handful of cash in the process. I rubbed my hands up and down her creamy skin inching closer and closer where I knew we were both dying to be.

She moaned into my mouth and I took that as my que to finally touch her. I brought my dominate hand up her leg until my fingers brushed over her wet center. She was soaked and it made me even more eager to fuck her brains out. But I had a plan that I needed to stick to so I pulled away from our kiss.

"You're so wet for me already." She hummed in agreement. "But I don't plan to get you off just yet." She groaned. "Stand up."

She stood again and turned to face me. This time I stood as well and looked down at her as she stared at me with innocent eyes. _She is playing this part so well._ I ran the back of my hand down her cheek and her eyes closed as she leaned into my touch.

"Take your hair down."

She quickly removed the ties and threw them a side. I walked around behind her as she shook out her hair and I was fanned with the smell of her. When I was directly behind her I kissed her neck one time before grabbing the bottom of her dress and lifting it up her body. She lifted her arms so I could fully remove it and throw it to the floor. I leaned in for one more kiss on her soft skin before stepping back again.

"Remove your panties."

She looked at me innocently over her shoulders before she hooked her thumbs on each side and pushed the pok-a-dot fabric down her completely straight legs. I bent my knees a little to finally get a look at the source of the wetness I had felt earlier. My dick twitch as if to beg to me put him in there but I again had to remind myself to stick to the plan as she stood back up and looked at me over her shoulder again.

"Turn around." She did so and I licked my lips at the sight of her beautiful body. After I had my fill I spoke to her again. "Now I want you to undress me."

She nodded and walked around behind me. I felt her hands come around to slip my suit jacket off. I quickly toed off my shoes and socks as she walked over to gingerly lay my jacket on the chair that I had just occupied. She walked back over towards me in all her naked glory and made quick work of my shirt, pants and boxers. After she helped me step out of my boxers I saw her eyes go to my very prominent erection as she licked her lips. _Nope, sorry honey no taste for you tonight._

"Get up and go lay on the center of the bed."

I watched as she followed my direction. I loved the sight of her lying on our bed in nothing but her red heels. I committed the sight to memory as I walk over to her and crawl onto the bed situating myself near her feet. I start by kissing her ankle and slowly make my way up her leg while pushing it apart from the other one.

"I normally don't do this with girls like you but you look so fucking good I just have to taste you." I said as my kisses brought me to where her leg met her hip.

She shivered slightly at the realization of what I was going to do and I smiled. I leaned in and placed a kiss on her lower lips and Bella sucked in a breath. One quick lick and she let it out. I spread her all the way open with my fingers and licked her bottom to top again. Her hands went to my hair and it only edged me on. I flicked her clit with the tip of my tongue and started to work. A few minutes later she was panting and writhing as I started to finger fuck her.

"Oh God that feels so good."

I curled my fingers and came into contact with the ridged patch of skin that was her g spot. Her hips bucked at first contact but I continued to run my fingers over it with ever entry and exit.

"You're so good. Don't stop. Almost…"

I felt her clamp around my fingers so trust them in and rubbed her g spot as my flat tongue worked her swollen clit side to side with the shaking of my head.

She screamed loud as she came all over my fingers and face. I slowed my pace but kept gently massaging her until she came all the way down. When her body was completely limp I withdrew my fingers and made my way up her body until I kissed her so that she could taste herself on my lips. She kissed me back hungrily and pushed her tongue into my all too willing mouth. She pulled away from the kiss grabbing may hand and brought my moist fingers between her lips. It was so erotic to me that Bella enjoyed her tastes as much as I did.

By this point I was tired of ignoring my throbbing dick and decided to finally give him some pleasure as well. I sat up and rolled Bella onto her side. She looked at me curiously until I straddled her bottom leg and brought the other one up against my chest. I grabbed my painfully hard cock and brought it to her entrance. I gave her a wink and pushed in. I had to stop for a minute at the pure heaven I felt from being so deep inside her. She had always fit around me so perfectly I couldn't even imagine being with someone else. I started to move rather quickly for a starting pace but I was just so worked up at this point I didn't even care.

This was a position that we hadn't tried before and after this experience I was pretty sure by her moans that it would become part of our routine. I fucked her relentlessly in the position for several minutes,

"Fuck you feel so good baby." She moaned in responds. "I want you to ride me now. Can you do that for me?" She nodded.

I with drew from her and resituated to lie on my back as she got up off the bed and straddled my hips. Without hesitation she reached underneath herself to help guide little Eddie to her opening. As she moved down onto my still hard cock we both let out simultaneous moans of pleasure. I didn't even get a second to adjust before she placed her hands on my chest and started to ride me hard.

"Just like that baby." I said in an out of breath voice.

She fucked me in earnest until we were sweaty, swearing, and close to climaxing. I moved one hand from her hip to play with her clit in hopes of getting her as close as I was. Before I knew it she her whole body tensed above me and stilled. I gabbed onto her hips with both hands and thrust upward.

"Oh my GOD!!!" She screamed as she came for the second time.

With her clamped down on me I couldn't take it anymore and after a two more thrusts I came inside of her while screaming her real name.

Exhaustedly she collapsed onto my chest, joining me in my fight to regain my breathing. After we finally stopped breathing like sprint runners Bella removed her shoes and we both got under the covers where she placed her hand on my chest and I wrapped my arm around her.

"So how much money ended up on the floor?"

I laughed. "Six hundred dollars."

"Oooo. I guess I'll have to call Alice tomorrow to go shopping."

"Well babe you most defiantly earned it."


End file.
